Trisha Yearwood's Bonus Holiday

Trisha Yearwood photo courtesy of Big Machine Records.

May 6, 2008 — Trisha Yearwood’s never experienced labor pains, but she likely finds herself being appreciated this Sunday on Mother’s Day. When she married Garth Brooks, she became part of a household that already included three girls, and she’s had to learn on her feet what it’s like to be a mom. One of her first decisions was not to refer to herself as a stepmother.

"I call it bonus mom," she told the national radio show GAC Nights: Live From Nashville. "Stepmom evokes Cinderella stories in my head, so I like bonus mom. Jada Pinkett Smith taught me that one. I was somewhere talkin’ about it. I said, ‘I’m looking for a better word,’ and she says, ‘Bonus mom.’ I’m a bonus mom. That’s better. It just changes everything."

The kids’ perception of her is not the only thing that’s been altered in her relationship with Garth’s daughters. So has Trisha’s view of her responsibility to them.

"I guess I realized for the first time as an adult the sacrifice that parents make for their kids," she said. "I really had to learn that it’s not all about me. And I’d love to say that I knew that before, but, you know, I’m still struggling with it. When you don’t have children, you can be selfish, and when you do have children — whether you birthed them yourself or whether you have them by marriage — you can’t be first. They have to be first."

She learned how serious a commitment that is from Garth. He is, after all, the man who retired from touring so that he could spend time with his daughters while they grew up. And, in fact, when he played 9 performances in Kansas City last November, he flew back to Oklahoma every day to be a father to his girls.